I need a plan…
A really big plan…
A plan that is fail proof…
Because reality is Cancer and Grief are still very much at work in our household.
Before cancer you would find us each evening with our children, gathered around the dinner table just after 6 pm. We had 5 chairs and two benches packed full of bodies. Daddy sat at the head of the table with his girls gathered around. Josh always sat to my left, with Millie and Little Man on my right. Our table was FULL…LOUD…LIVELY and we loved every (almost every) minute of it.
During cancer you would find a few gathered at the table for dinner. Maybe the babysitter and 2-3 kids. Josh moved to his own home, teens got drivers licenses, littles ate dinner without a mommy, daddy, or Millie. The menu was whatever showed up in our home from the generosity of others.
After cancer, as we walked into a life of grief, daddy returned to work and school went back into session. The teens went to a private school for the first time ever, an hour away. They joined sports that kept them out late in the evenings. Mommy and the remaining two little people were home for dinner alone… usually junk food, convenience food, fast and easy foods because mommy just can’t seem to find the cooking groove again. Grief does that to a person. It takes the things you think you can handle and proves to you that you can’t. It takes the things you are not good at (COOKING!) and makes you despise them. It makes you so tired and overwhelmed that you literally cannot do much more than the basics. It kicks you when you are down…hard!
So, I realize I need a plan…
I need to make a meal plan and then shop and then cook and then fight the fight to make the kids want to eat real food again.
We need to focus on killing the sugar monster and taming the carb demons that rage in neglected bodies. To offer healthy things that actually taste good. SJ commented, “Mama, it is just that nothing healthy tastes good!”
Today I am starting my list, focusing my thoughts, and trying again to commit to cooking my family meals in spite of grief. I will fight the feelings of overwhelmed, battle the comments of ‘YUCK”, and do the ‘right thing’ for the sake of my family.
I am taking this seriously as encouraged in Ecclesiastes 5. Not that I am making it a vow to God, rather I need to be a person of my word that follows through in the areas of life that only my family sees. I need to provide nourishment to them as a mother and wife.
𝟰 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗮 𝘃𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗼 𝗚𝗼𝗱, 𝗱𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗱𝗲𝗹𝗮𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝗳𝘂𝗹𝗳𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗶𝘁. 𝗛𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗻𝗼 𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝗳𝗼𝗼𝗹𝘀; 𝗳𝘂𝗹𝗳𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘃𝗼𝘄. 𝟱 𝗜𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗮 𝘃𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝗻 𝘁𝗼 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗳𝘂𝗹𝗳𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗶𝘁. 𝟲 𝗗𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗹𝗲𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗺𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗶𝗻. 𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝗱𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗲𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝗺𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗲𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗿, “𝗠𝘆 𝘃𝗼𝘄 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗮 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲.” 𝗪𝗵𝘆 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗚𝗼𝗱 𝗯𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗿𝘆 𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝗮𝘆 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗼𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸 𝗼𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱𝘀? 𝟳 𝗠𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝗱𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗺𝗮𝗻𝘆 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘀. 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗳𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗚𝗼𝗱.
~ Ecclesiastes 5: 4-7
See you just after six o’clock. Pull up a chair and say a little prayer for us…
Blessings sweet friends…
｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★｡･:*:･ﾟ☆
I still believe in Millie’s Miracle
｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ Hebrews 11:1 ｡･:*:･ﾟ☆
︵‿︵‿୨☆୧‿︵‿︵
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